President Bush, in the midst of a mess in Iraq, should be glad he's not a contestant on "Survivor." Not only is there serious doubt as to whether Vice President Dick Cheney could handle the physical challenges, but there's no way Bush's transparent lies would fool the likes of Rob "the Robfather" Mariano or "Big Tom" Buchanan.

In Bob Woodward's new book, "Plan of Attack," Bush himself revealed he began planning the Iraq war immediately after 9/11. This only a few months after the White House denied former Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill's charge that Bush started making Iraq war plans at that time. That's a 180-degree turn (i.e. Bush lied).

And remember the good old days when Bush would "stay on message" about weapons of mass destruction being the reason for the Iraq war? But, oops, there weren't any. And besides, as Deputy Secretary of Defense Paul Wolfowitz said in July's Vanity Fair, the WMD justification for war was used simply "for bureaucratic reasons." Reasons to back up Bush's obsession with Iraq …

In last Tuesday's press conference, Bush clung to the hope that Iraqi WMD might still be found. He said, "They could still be hidden, like the 50 tons of mustard gas in a turkey farm" in Libya. On Wednesday, the White House was forced to correct this statement. There was never 50 tons of mustard gas on a Libyan turkey farm. Bush just made that up. If you ask me, the Crawford Ranch is the only turkey farm we have to worry about.

Also during the press conference, Bush was asked if he misled Americans about the cause for the Iraq war. Bush was reduced to saying the United States was fighting for freedom, which is "the Almighty's gift to every man and woman in this world." Don't look now, but I hope the Almighty gave the Iraqis a gift receipt with their new freedom. This response, however, was a variation on Bush's earlier refrain that American troops would be "greeted as liberators" by Iraqis. That might not have been a lie, per se, but I'd like to see Bush ask American soldiers in Iraq if they feel misled about their role as "liberators."

Bush's maze of lies and contradictions is hurting him politically. Even though, according to the Associated Press, Bush spent $40 million on his recent advertising blitz, his poll numbers continue to drop. According to a recent ABC News/Washington Post poll, if the election were held today, Sen. John Kerry would garner 48 percent of the vote to Bush's 44 percent. Without Ralph Nader in the race, Kerry blasts through the margin of error to beat Bush by nine points.

Yes, Bush should definitely be happy he's not on "Survivor." Bush's lies are so far from reality, he wouldn't qualify for a "reality show." His lies are going to come home to roost and he's going to be voted off the island.