The student news site of Marquette University

Marquette Wire

The student news site of Marquette University

Marquette Wire

The student news site of Marquette University

Marquette Wire

OLIVER: A toast to the happy Kimye couple


Imagine the groom at the altar – music blasting, machines spitting out fog, a roomba with an iPod attached to it officiating. The blushing bride walks down the aisle, money rains on to the attendees and one hundred doves all wearing miniature gold chains and plastic sunglasses are released as Jay Z sits there nodding politely. This isn’t Aziz Ansari’s biggest dream. It’s Kanye West’s wedding and “The Good Life” doesn’t even begin to describe it.

I can only hope that the teddy bear makes an appearance at Kanye’s wedding, or, preferably, that we all wake up from this very bad dream and get back to ignoring ridiculous celebrity weddings and start talking about things that actually matter, such as our government disfunction. Instead of dedicating loads of coverage to something that is a year off in the future, I see stories about “Kimye” on a daily basis and wonder why this sludge is even news, media outlets should cover pressing issues such as the roll out of the Affordable Care Act, poverty and our nations slow economic recovery.

According to many nameless sources, and by that I mean Bruce Jenner, Kanye has taken the lead role in planning his wedding, going as far as saying the egotistical rapper turned into a “bridezilla.”

This disfunction and excess can be summed up with a radio interview in which Kanye said he only wanted one thing for his wedding – “Two words, Fighter jets.”

It’s no secret that Kanye has an ego. The Yeezus, half Jesus half Yeezy, tour features Jesus bestowing knowledge on the often masked rapper. His most recent masterpiece touts that he is a god. The same track also has a guest appearance by God himself. Kanye is the definition of new money, and, like Gatsby, has no problem flaunting it.

The rapper who once talked about the streets of Chi-town moved past his humble beginnings and this wedding will be the culmination of the persona that is Yeezus. Kanye is the biggest voice in rap, and there will be no escaping the seemingly endless amount of coverage that will follow the rapper as he prepares to marry Kim Kardashian.

The bride-to-be Kanye (sorry Kim) is sparing no expense to make sure he has the wedding he always dreamed of. For Kim, this is her third wedding and the 33-year-old is letting Kanye take the lead.

Matthew McDonnell, a senior in the college of Engineering, said he finds the fact that the Kardashians are famous, and celebrity news in general, hilarious. He doesn’t believe they are celebrities nor does he believe that they deserve as much coverage as they get.

“If we spent half as much time or resources on important world issues we would be a lot better off,” he said.

McDonnell is unequivocally right. We need to stop wasting so much time talking about celebrities and start talking about the issues that really matter.

The wedding that is yet to occur already has an absolutely ridiculous amount of coverage. At least it will all culminate with the limo the happy couple leaves in blasting a custom track of Kanye listening to Kanye while Kanye raps about Kanye.

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