Remember when you were eight and your rich relative handed you a $20 bill and you thought the world was at your fingertips, that nothing could stop you from being happy? Well I must have a rich uncle somewhere, because this week in sports has been my $20 bill. Let's recap the events:

Colorado University is facing allegations of luring football recruits to campus with wild sex orgies. The news surfaced when three women claimed they were raped at one of the infamous campus parties. There must be something about the state of Colorado that drives a man's sexual appetite to the point of rape allegations, eh Kobe?

George Foreman wants to come back and fight at age 55, if he can get to 225 pounds. He has said he's already dropped 25 pounds making him slightly lighter than a pontoon boat. Stick to pummeling burgers pal. Nothing is for sure, but there are whispers that common sense will be his opponent.

Mike Tyson is looking for another fight because he's broke. Not that this is fresh news, but I'm going to stick up for the guy here. After all if you had to spend all your money on trial lawyers and civil suits, wouldn't you be broke too?

Rick Majerus is leaving the University of Utah for good after having taken the Utes to the NCAA tournament 10 times and losing the national championship to Kentucky in 1998. Thanks for the memories Rick, well at least the one memory.

Pitchers and catchers are reporting to spring training camps this weekend. The Brewers have already begun printing "Wait 'Til Next Year" signs. They will be issued to the first 5,000 people at the stadium Opening Day, assuming 5,000 people show up. If not the signs will be traded to other organizations in an attempt to slash payroll.

The USA men's soccer team will not be participating in the 2004 summer Olympics in Athens. Neither will the men's baseball team. For 13 of you that plan on watching the Olympics, I offer my deepest condolences.

The Pacers routed the Bulls for their league-high 39th victory of the season. After the game the Bulls were informed they were supposed to be an NBA team. Confused glances were exchanged, then everyone chuckled and drove home.

Former Ohio State running back Maurice Clarett won his lawsuit against the NFL. Extremists now believe there will be a slew of high school players jumping strait to the NFL. However the prospect of a 19-year-old high school veteran running over a 30-year-old NFL veteran seems about as plausible as a newborn kitten running over a docked oil tanker.

Boy what a fun week, but I still can't help but want that $20 bill now.