I’m not a fan of online classes.
I’ve got attention deficit disorder. Let me assure you, it sure doesn’t lend itself well to guidance like, “Be responsible for your own timetables, and know what day of the week it is despite not having a concrete schedule.”
My concept of time is nonexistent; I don’t notice time passing until it’s 2 a.m. and I’ve been staring at a puzzle for five hours straight. (Not an exaggeration, either. It’s happened more than once in the past few weeks.)
As one can imagine, not being able to sense the passing of time makes it extremely difficult to keep up with online classes and the deadlines they bring. Not to mention I’m a biomedical sciences student, and it’s genuinely impossible to have an anatomical dissection course in which you can’t dissect anything.
I guess one positive is that I’m rarely late to class since I don’t have to get out of bed.
As for being stuck inside? Gonna be real here: I don’t really spend a lot of my time out socializing to begin with. Given the choice, I’d prefer to stay in and hang out with friends who are willing to do the same. In that respect, this whole “quarantine” thing has been kind of a breeze.
My family doesn’t live all that far away from campus, and I’ve never minded living with them. I get to see my brother more since all the high schools are closed down. I helped him do math — like chemistry related math for heck’s sake, which I haven’t done in literal years and never wanted to do again.
As a family, we used to do puzzles weekly. With the time we have at home now, we can get four to five puzzles done per week, depending on the size. It’s family time I didn’t expect to get since everyone tends to be pretty busy. So in that respect, everything’s been kinda cool.
I’ve had time to pursue some hobbies and play some video games — I’ve spent lots of time playing the new Animal Crossing game — and I get to see my dog, my cat and my snake. If it weren’t for the knowledge that I’m here because there’s a potentially deadly virus infecting a large amount of the population, it’d seem like an extended vacation.
Except, I actually do miss going places. I miss having the option to go places, I miss sitting in a Starbucks doing homework and I miss visiting my friends.
Most of all, I miss knowing that the people I care about will be okay if they have to leave the house. My grandma and grandpa are in a high-risk age group. My mother and I have asthma. My father is severely immunocompromised and has always been the primary errand-runner in the house — largely because he insists on it — and I can’t really describe here the sense of dread that comes from knowing he’s going to end up in a public place several times in the coming week.
I can’t explain how it feels to know that there are people who don’t believe this virus is a threat, who refuse to self-isolate and who knowingly contaminate surfaces because they aren’t taking this seriously. I can’t explain how it feels to read about overcrowded hospitals and the frankly terrifying lack of medical supplies.
I suppose the closest emotion I could approximate here is a gradual sinking sense of dread mixed with frustration, disbelief and a heaping portion of contrived reassurance as things catch flame around me.
So, yeah, it’s been cool being home. Would be cooler if the circumstances were, y’know, way different.
Do me a favor. Wash your hands and Stay. Home.
This story was written by Skylar Daley. She can be reached at [email protected].
