Movies You’d Only Rent from Blockbuster

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This week Blockbuster Video closed down its physical store operations for good, bringing on some serious nostalgia for the archaic ritual of physically leaving the house get a movie. In honor of the blue and gold rentals of our childhood, we selected a few movies most often linked to our late fee receipts and memories in the age of Blockbuster.

Flubber

With many goo-centric dance scenes, Robin Williams in a bow tie and a classic absent minded scientist story, 1997’s “Flubber” is just ridiculous and goofy enough to be the perfect rental. ’90s kids everywhere will remember only wishing Flubber were real to play tricks on our friends and dance around with maracas in our kitchens, just like in the movie. Surprisingly, ’80s movie powerhouse, John Hughes wrote the script for this sentimentally (and literally) gooey movie.

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Photo via dadson-laserdiscs.com

The Mask

From one gloriously green and cheesy premise to the next, “The Mask” is about a normal man who finds an ancient tribal mask that gives him the power of green-face, wearing sweat pimp suits, elasticity and being a total D-bag. Carey struck a lot of Blockbuster gold, but this 1994 release seems the one most fitting for a mid-’90s rental with just the right balance of family-friendly appeal to be out of stock for weeks, goddammit.

Photo via imdb.com
Photo via imdb.com

The Adventures of Mary-Kate & Ashley

Tiny twins in trench coats singing songs about solving crime before bed time. How cute. There were 11 installments of the “Adventures of Mary-Kate & Ashley” musical mysteries from 1994 to 1997 that provided months of obvious rental choices. With product placement sagas like “The Case of the Sea World Adventure” and “The Case of the U.S. Space Camp Mission,” the series adds to a solid Olsen pantheon of Blockbuster VHS classics like “Passport to Paris,” “To Grandmother’s House we Go,” “Billboard Dad” and our personal favorite “How the West Was Fun.” 

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Honey, I Shrunk the Kids

Plenty of Rick Moranis freaking out in a crazy helmet, run-ins with insects and an epic bowl of cheerios added this to list of acceptable family movies to rent with minimal tantrums thrown in those blue and gold aisles.

Photo via imdb.com
Photo via imdb.com

Spice World

“Spice World” follows Sporty, Scary, Baby, Posh and Ginger on their way to a show with platform shoes, metallic fabrics and liberal use of  the word “bloody.” This one has all the Spice Girls hits and even a cameo from Sir Elton John himself. “Spice World” was reluctantly allowed as a Blockbuster pick from parents who would no way in hell actually purchase this glittery British invasion.

Photo via impawards.com
Photo via impawards.com

Good Burger

Down with the evil overlord fast food chain Mondo burger! Long live Ed, his secret sauce and the song “We’re All Dudes!” We already loved Kenen Thompson and Kel Mitchell on “All That” and “Kenen and Kel,” plus as a Nickelodeon movie the VHS was orange which blew. our. minds.

Photo via nickelodeon.wickia.com
Photo via nickelodeon.wickia.com

Ernest Goes to…

Ernest was a busy man. With nine movies following the exploits of country bumpkin Earnest Warrell, Earnest travels to camp, jail, Africa and various holiday themed locales. These movies do not hold up all that well, a fact which will surprise approximately no one, but with so many installments and just enough dumb charm the Ernest movies were the kind of film you only ever saw in Blockbuster, but rented anyway.

Photo via impawards.com
Photo via impawards.com

 

Twisted Metal

Blockbuster also had video games! And before there was Grand Theft Auto’s controversies over women and violence, the dawn of PlayStation brought “Twisted Metal” which simply asked contestants to engage in a ruthless car fight to the death. Nothing instilled heart like  the  demented clown ice cream truck, Sweet Tooth, throwing “Napalm Cones” your way. Now that was good old fashioned family fun.

emuparadise.me
emuparadise.me

 

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