Upon the end of his career as a Golden Eagle at Marquette, Jerel McNeal is lost.

"This is one of the things that is just in the back of your mind that you never really think about until it gets here," he said.

But now it is here. And McNeal is being forced to think about it. He is being forced to relive those final seconds of his team's 83-79 loss to Missouri; his determination that allowed the Golden Eagles to come back from a 16-point deficit and the disappointing, but perhaps inevitable, end to the 2008-'09 season.

"You just think about every single play. All the plays that you made, all the plays you didn't make, plays that teammates made or didn't make or could have made," he said. "You think about all those things, because any time you've got a game like that, that's so close, a play here or there could turn the game around."

Yet it seems as though the game against Missouri was marred by plays that go the wrong way.

Plays like a missed free throw when Marquette trailed by one with 38 seconds remaining. Or a ghostly injury that allowed a teammate to step to the free throw line as a replacement. Or even a once-in-a-million misstep that served as the proverbial nail in Marquette's coffin.

McNeal doesn't want this season to be over. He doesn't want to think about his future basketball career, or reflect on his career wearing blue and gold.

He is not alone. Teammate Dominic James is haunted by many of the same emotions. They sit with him, waiting to surface.

"I really haven't thought about it," James said. "We haven't started the reminiscing process yet."

James' situation, in some sense, is unique. Having already, at least partially, come to terms with his season being over — it was supposed to be over — he suddenly has to do so again.

Difficult, yes, but James wouldn't have it any other way.

"A gift had been taken away from me, and it's just like getting it back," James said of his return for Marquette's last game. "I felt like it was the right way, just going out with my teammates like that."

James said finishing his career on the court was just as important as a win. And while he does admit that may be selfish, the choice was only partially his.

"I just wanted him to finish his career in a uniform," coach Buzz Williams said. "Despite the potential outcome, I wanted him to finish with his teammates the same way that he started."

Both McNeal and James maintain that one play does not lose a game. The missed free throw didn't seal it, nor did the fact that James played despite later admitting his foot "wasn't a great percentage" healthy. But even so, the play that will stick most in the minds of fans, is Lazar Hayward stepping across the baseline. To his teammates, that is unfair.

"We wouldn't be in the NCAA Tournament if it wasn't for Lazar," McNeal said with a laugh.

"That's a mistake any of us could have made," James said.

The seniors' words may be true, but one thing is for sure, Hayward's learning curve has just ended. The Golden Eagles are now his team.

"Lazar, obviously, is our best player," Williams said.

That's is. Hayward is Marquette's best player.

Going hand-in-hand with Hayward's future success at Marquette, however, will be Williams'. The coach knew when he took this job that the real challenge would begin when the trio of senior guards departed, but he is prepared for the change.

"I think the best coaches always coach in relation to their personnel," Williams said.

Even with his sights set on next year, reality hasn't quite set in yet for Williams. When asked if he had looked at the game, he immediately shook his head and said, "No. It will be a while."

"I have it in my mind," he said. "If I could get it out of my mind I wish that I could."

At least he has company.