John Bergstrom: Fr. Wild! I am glad I ran into you.

Fr. Wild: What's up?

JB: Well, it seems as though everyone really wants to be the Warriors.

Fr.W: I know, but how do we change from Golden Eagles?

JB: I just found this book "10 Easy Steps to Changing Your University's Nickname Before Moving to the Big East." I think it should do the trick.

Fr.W: Perfect!

JB: Step 1: Start discussions with your board of trustees and school president to get people's hopes up.

Fr.W: Step 2: Issue a statement that says they won't consider a certain name. Then consider the name you are not considering.

JB: Step 3: Say you are continuing discussions. Make little to no progress.

Fr.W: Step 4: Repeat Step 3.

JB: Step 5: Repeat Step 4.

Fr.W: Step 6: Wait until the last millisecond to make a decision.

JB: Step 7: When decision day arrives choose a name no one likes.

Fr.W: Step 8: Wait fifteen seconds. This should be enough time for the media to chastise you. Wait fifteen more seconds for irritated, protesting students.

JB: Step 9: After a few days be so ashamed of your nickname choice that you have to announce a totally new decision process.

Fr.W: Step 10: Discount the name people wanted from the new process. Arrive at the same name you wanted to change.

JB: It's so simple! I hope we can handle it.

Fr.W: Let's get to work!

This conversation probably never took place. But one thing is clear: The board of trustees and Fr. Wild got themselves into an unnecessary mess that had no hope of being cleaned up.

I understand our university does not want to offend people. But a return to the Warriors should not be considered an insult to Native Americans. They do not have a franchise on the word "warrior." There have been Greek and Roman and Scottish warriors. It's not as if students wanted Willie Wampum back.

There is little the university can do to fix this blunder. The best thing right now is to lay low. When the time is right the university can make things right by revamping a stale basketball program with better personnel. But the university cannot afford another PR gaff like this one.

Instead of being creative the board was unimaginative. Instead of listening to the Marquette community Fr. Wild turned a deaf ear. They had an opportunity to embrace the community's values and traditions. Instead the board and Fr. Wild delivered a slap to our face. That slap left a mark on our cheek in the shape of a Golden Eagle. And it is not likely to go away.

This viewpoint was published in The Marquette Tribune on August 29, 2005.