I have read in The Marquette Tribune over the last issues and the battle of the sexes columns. After giving it some thought I would like to add my two cents to this age-old argument. First, I am not an expert on relationships. To say I have not had much success in the field would be like describing the Sahara Desert as slightly water deprived. So I am not trying to lecture anybody, let alone the two respectable columnists of the Tribune. What I have seen from these columns and learned from both male and female friends is that neither men nor women have any clue about the other.

Anyone, male or female, telling you that they understand the opposite sex is a liar and a cad. Both men and women claim to be the most righteous of the two. I do not know if any of that's true or not, but I do know that most of my friends, both male and female, are usually confused as to what the intentions of the other sex are.

To clarify, both sexes draw the other along. It may be in different ways, but we all do it. Guys, we can be jerks and sometimes we don't pay attention. Ladies, you can make things much more complicated than they should be, and you really do not know men as well as you think you do. There is a solution to this. Being a history major, I like things that are old and I turn to an invention that has been around a long time but seldom used: language. It may not seem like it, but both men and women can speak the same language: English.

Instead of trying to send and read subtle signals and legalspeak, how about actually swallowing your pride and spelling it out to that special person. Men, if you are seeing a girl and you like them, tell them. Ladies if a guy asks you out, give him a simple, straight answer. No, its not chivalrous; yes, it's potentially embarrassing, but so what.

If someone is doing something to you that you don't understand, tell them. There needs to be respect because everyone's feelings need to be accounted for. It's hard to be rational, because no one wants to be rational. We should recognize what we do not know about the opposite sex and respect that we might have more fun together, because if it were possible to figure out the opposite sex, human beings would not have gone to the moon first.

This viewpoint was published in The Marquette Tribune on October 18, 2005.