I recently went to a discussion hosted by V.O.I.C.E, where the topic was "Men, masculinity and sexual violence." After hearing the talk, I thought about gender-based violence on college campuses—whether it be verbal or physical—and how people's perception of masculinity plays a role in it.
On college campuses across the country, gender-based violence is a serious issue that goes unreported. There are advertisements saying that violence is wrong, but there is nothing that ever goes in depth to look at the root of the aggression that leads to violence. We can look at many things and interpret them as normal behavior, but often it is truly hyper-masculinity in disguise.
For example, a woman wearing any type of outerwear can become the victim of unwarranted attention. Thus, she must take precautions that men don't necessarily have to. Women should not go out at night alone. They must worry about the clothes they choose to wear and the language they use in conversation. Women must worry about sending the wrong signal to men. Is this the fault of women or do men have to shelter some responsibility?
Men are taught from a young age that they must be tough and exert overtly masculine traits. This can cause problems later in life when they interact with members of the opposite sex.
Men are given a strict ideal of how a man should act and how a woman should behave. You can see it in fraternity boys or sports-enthused males with their stereotypical sexist jock behavior. They feel their desires outweigh the feelings of women. It starts with the language they use, referring to women with a word that rhymes with witch, or any other variation of degrading word choice.
Things like this lead to men making assumptions about women because of the way they dress, and in severe instances can lead to violent episodes, sexual or non-sexual.
We are now led back to the cause and why these things are underreported. Men are led to believe that their actions are natural. Unfair comments such as "she wanted it" or "she was asking for it" sprout up.
This coincides with the underreporting, and often this representation of masculinity is reiterated in the media. Subsequently, femininity has been marked the exact opposite of that of masculinity in modern culture.
Females are presented to be submissive and sexual objects for brutish men to use at their will. We see these stereotypes in music videos and "reality" television. In these cases, art is not imitating life, but life is imitating art.
In the case of reporting assault, women feel their story will not be believed or they do not want publicity to highlight the event out of fear that stereotypes presubscribed the roles of masculinity. Women may also fail to report as a result of being influenced by outside sources that such behavior is "just how it is."
A question that was brought up at the end of the discussion is: where do we go from here? Topics regarding masculinity, femininity and sexism are as taboo as topics regarding race in politics or homosexuality in religion. Dialogue is only encouraged between the willing without the input of those who do not feel that these things are issues.
Apathy or failure to acknowledge the issues should not be accepted. As a community, we need to engage with those we know who are falling into believing these stereotypes of masculinity, and consequently, the stereotypes of femininity.
When the young man reported being slapped by his girlfriend to the Department of Public Safety, many people laughed. Is it that the humor was in that he was slapped or that he was slapped by a woman and, even further, reported? The reasoning for our reactions to these types of events needs to be discussed.
If we continue down the path of promoting hyper-masculinity then in the next few decades men will be replaced with steroid-induced cyborgs filled with rage. My only advice for preventing such a fate is to talk and to listen.