"Ramen Noodles, Rent and Resumes: An After-College Guide to Life."

The book book sounded perfect — and the title was so damn catchy. Touted as the "must-get gift for every grad," I knew that inside the cover I would find the answers to all the fear- and anxiety-ridden questions plaguing myself and other Marquette seniors. What is the best way to budget on a starting salary? What if I don't have a salary because I can't find a job in this economy? What if I move back home? What if my major was a poor life choice and I hate my job? What is the best flavor of Ramen Noodles?

Well, lucky for me, the book's author, Kristen Fischer, provided all the answers, and now I am going to share her incredible intelligence and insight with the Marquette community. You're welcome…I think.

One of Fischer's first tidbits of advice tells readers "that first job or few jobs out of school may not be groundbreaking." Thank God she told me that, because I had expected to cure cancer and create world peace in my first after-college gig. I sure would have been disappointed.

While our first jobs may not be groundbreaking, Fischer's next tip sure is. "Most graduates — male or female — don't move into an apartment and know instantly how to make fabulous dinners," she explains. See, groundbreaking. I really expected that when I moved into a place of my own, I would magically become a world-renowned chef hosting fancy dinner parties on expensive china.

Fischer saved me from a huge letdown.

She addresses relationships too, writing that it might be difficult to "keep a college flame going across the miles." Weird. I've always been told that long-distance relationships are the easiest and most fulfilling.

In the final chapters of the book, Fischer advises readers to not spend money unless they have it. Brilliance. A graduate quoted in the book learned that lesson the hard way instead of in high school like everyone else. She racked up thousands in credit card debt before she graduated and says she's not sure who to blame for it: her parents, the credit card companies or her university. Hmm — obviously she's not forgetting anyone, like herself.

When Fischer graduated, she owed $5,000 on credit cards, had never made a resume and had never paid rent. She must have gone to school in a magical land where housing is free and job opportunities grow on trees. If anyone knows where this land is, please let me know.

Marquette is not located in such a place. Instead, we are in a big city where it's impossible to remain so sheltered. Pre-graduation job and internship opportunities abound, we have a great Career Services Center at our fingertips and the people around us provide ample realistic views of paying rent, managing finances and even what to expect at that first job.

So, here's a dual "here's to you." Thanks, Kristen Fischer, for wasting my time and money with commonsense tips you would have to be an idiot to not know. And, more importantly, thanks Marquette for preparing us to face the real world with real life lessons, job search skills and determination — and this time, I'm serious.