I am not Bill Simmons. But any of you that know me, know that I often wish I was the ESPN columnist.

One reason I envy Mr. Simmons is because his readership base is large enough and loyal enough so that every few weeks he can dedicate an entire column to his mailbag.

Well, frankly, you people are not cutting it, so I decided to take matters into my own hands by providing my own mail, to which I will now respond.

Howie, sophomore, Mashuda Hall:

Hey Nick! First of all, I love your work. Keep it up. Basketball season is coming up soon, and I was wondering what you are looking forward to the most about this season?

Tough question Howie, tough question. I have given this a lot of thought, and besides the free media buffet before every game, I can't wait to see how much worse at 3-point shooting Marquette will become now that the line has been moved back a foot.

The change was implemented in order to make the NCAA more guard-oriented. Well, the Golden Eagles are definitely a guard-oriented team, but given that they already can't shoot, I don't see this helping. What is the over/under on air balls this season?

Gus, senior, Marquette II:

Nick, if the Big East men's basketball conference was a fantasy basketball league and you had the first overall pick in your draft who would you take?

First let me say that since this is a fantasy league, the player who I choose is the player with the best stat line, not necessarily the best player in the Big East or the player that is most important to their team.

That being said, I think it is safe to rule out any Marquette players. I'm going with Hasheem Thabeet. Maybe not the sexiest pick, but I think he is one with a lot of upside. I don't see any way that Thabeet could finish his junior season without improving upon his 10.5 points and 7.9 rebounds. He is still learning the game of basketball, and I have to believe that he'll soon realize that he is 7-foot-3, 263 pounds and will start acting like it. He'll win you field goal percentage (0.603) and blocked shots (4.45 per game) single handedly, and his free throw percentage (0.698) could be worse for a man his size.

Plus there is the added bonus that every time he does something good you can use his name as a fun verb. For example: "Hasheem just Thabeet the crap out of your team!"

Mrs. Bullock, Fridley, MN:

Nickolas, I am so proud of you! I know you would be successful at anything you choose to do, but I was wondering, what Marquette sport do you think you would be best at? P.S. Why don't you call home more often?

I wanted to leave this letter out of the mailbag for obvious reasons, but alas it is a question worth discussing.

I used to play basketball in high school, so that was my first inclination. But then I remembered talking to the Tribune's other sports columnist, Robby Douthitt, about trying out for the men's basketball team. I decided that I am probably less qualified than he was.

I also used to run cross country in high school (don't laugh). But I stopped because I had knee problems (read: I was really, really slow). Also, I didn't like the fact that my coach never had anything positive to say to me until one meet where I threw up about 50 yards from the finish line. Thanks, but no thanks coach.

I think I would go with soccer. Not because I think that the sport is easy, but because I think that field is large enough for coach Louis Bennett to be able to hide me for a few minutes here or there. I could play forward. Would it really hurt the team that much if there was one more guy on the field not scoring any goals?

Thanks to all of you who wrote in, and sorry I couldn't answer all of your questions, but I only have so much space.