Their semi-sober shouts at a sports bar near you rang out again this week.,”Every year, I hear people bellyaching because college basketball's season-ending tournament does not exist in college football. Those people also possess a mule-like stubbornness and wear their underwear in a bunch.
Their semi-sober shouts at a sports bar near you rang out again this week. You've heard them: "Gimme January Madness!" "Let 'em play it off!" "Decide it on the field!" "Screw the BCS!"
These phrases immediately identify the character of the person whose mouth just uttered such nonsense. Call them what you will: blithering idiot, imprudent imbecile, feeble-minded swine. They all work. I'm sure you can do better, but I have editors.
When the next incoherent moron starts ripping the Bowl Championship Series for its sheer incompetence, just remind him of his own. When the fool begins sketching a bracket for the "perfect" solution for college football's postseason, suggest that he use the steps he just drew as steady progression from unqualified stupidity.
Why be so harsh to these babbling nincompoops? Because the BCS worked. Again. That's right; the top two teams will play for the national title.
Hasty nitwit: "But LSU lost two games, why choose them?" Yes, the Tigers lost twice, but both losses came in triple overtime. America forgave Clinton, too. And LSU didn't lie. It fell short in a couple of heartbreakers.
Love-longing dope: "There won't be any Cinderella team this year." Just like Boise State last year, Hawaii finished the season unbeaten and will play a big-time team (Georgia) in a huge game (Sugar Bowl). Mid-major teams really require a 20-some-game winning streak before being considered for the national title.
Clueless schmuck: "How did Mizzou not get a BCS bid?" A tougher one, but let's be serious. They lost twice to Oklahoma, and while Kansas lost to the Tigers, the Jayhawks still went 11-1. Furthermore, there might be a team with the same record playing for the national title.
Mumbling doofus: "The playoffs are a better way to stack teams up against each other." Au contraire. Unlike college basketball and the NFL, the season matters. If you love playoffs so much, admit that the entire fall is one big dang playoff.
An NFL team can lose eight games and still win the Super Bowl. College football runs a different scheme for determining its champion. Where March Madness continues to be the best part of the basketball season, the college football regular season makes every week a sort of elimination game.
Two-cent ninny: "But the championship game has two teams with at least one loss." You just complained about how you love a team's chances for redemption after losing. No double standards allowed, folks.
If you encounter prattling hogwash, please do anything short of violence to stop it. If you are a BCS-hater, I hear Marquette offers amazing counseling services.
The BCS functions as a well-oiled machine. LSU and Ohio State will face each other on Jan. 7, because they put up the most impressive years from the season openers until now.
If anybody wants to dispute that fact, hopefully they will realize it's those disagreements, squabbles and arguments that make college football so intriguing. Even if the majority of the bickering remains unintelligible gibberish.
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