Ladies, you can read every issue of "Cosmopolitan" with new twists on typical dating advice, and men, you can complain about women making life more dramatic then necessary, but no one will ever solve the mysteries of dating. Face it, men and women will never understand each other.

The lucky ones stumble upon their perfect match, while the hopeless romantics never stop believing fate will bring their soul-mate strolling in. So, what's my point? I mean, we all know dating can be a long process accompanied by a mix of extreme emotions — excitement, stress, frustration and sorrow.

But, since high school, when dating really began and the gossip about the school's couples became common knowledge before first period, I've seen so many girls and guys treat their first loves or temporary infatuations horribly.

Sometimes an apology does not fix the words that preceded it. There are no clear boundaries for when emotional abuse begins, and it can be difficult to detect.

I decided to write this column because of the stories I've heard from friends and my own personal experiences. Emotional abuse is severely underreported and for that reason statistical information doesn't really exist. But the problem is very real. Most of my views are from a woman's perspective, but I completely recognize that men can be and often are the victims of emotional abuse, as well.

I know women who aren't allowed to wear makeup or certain clothes because their man says so, and I've seen guys make women cry with no remorse. I've also seen girls who restrict their boyfriends from having friends who just happen to be girls. The examples seem endless. You can feel so close to a person and at the same time their comments can deeply hurt you, making emotional abusive relationships tough to get out of. The control and manipulation someone can impose on their girlfriend or boyfriend is not part of a healthy relationship.

So, how can you tell if you're suffering from emotional abuse? I'm not an expert by any means. The Web site www.womanabuseprevention.com contains a link to information for women (but it's also very helpful for men) for learning how to identify the abuse and how to handle it.

People find emotional abuse difficult to talk about. More education and awareness on the problem may help give people the strength to stand up for themselves. Some of the points the Web site lists as emotional abuse identifiers include receiving mixed messages, feeling that your thoughts and feelings aren't valued and continually facing unfounded jealousy, just to mention a few.

Everyone suffers from stress and at times emotions get out of control. Sometimes those frustrations get taken out on the people who mean the most to us. But when that situation frequently occurs then something is likely wrong. No one should stick around to be abused, especially if their partner isn't willing to acknowledge the problem. That's just my opinion.

Maybe I'm just another hopeless romantic, but we all deserve to find someone who makes us truly happy.