People keep talking about reform and cleaning up the system, but that takes work. Plus, to be frank, it is a boring solution. As a fickle member of the consumer public, I must be constantly entertained, because I have little to no attention span. If I want to see people following rules and guidelines, I can watch C-SPAN.

Now, as everyone knows, the best way to solve a problem is to completely ignore it and focus on a totally separate issue.

That's why the NCAA should take a page from the Olympics' game plan and add a new sport. The Olympics add a new sport every other day — sports like snowboarding and trampolining — in an effort to stay with the current high-tech, fiber optic, crazy times (which desperately call for both snowboarding and trampolining).

So what should the NCAA add? Well, the recent popular trend has been toward "Xtreme" sports, like skateboarding, motocross and doing tricks on bicycles. Xtreme is definitely the way to go, because unlike boring old "extreme" sports, Xtreme sports daringly omit the "e" and capitalize the "x." And if the NCAA decides that it wants to get Xtreme, I think I may have just the sport: SlamBall.

For those who don't know, SlamBall is a great sport that TNN (now known as Spike TV, a name that is infinitely cooler than TNN) invented in which mediocre basketball and football players play basketball. While this may sound boring, consider that they don't play on any ordinary, solid floor. They play on trampolines! And they can hit each other! Talk about brash, bold SlamBallery!

But the real appeal of adding an event like SlamBall is that it allows for the NCAA to finally get the whole intercollegiate athletics thing down pat. Football has "tradition" and "history," things that always seem to get in the way of stellar collegiate careers like those of Jim Harrick, Carlton Dotson, Maurice Clarrett, Rick Neuheisel and Mike Price.

The NCAA can start over and do things right. The progressive, understanding and shameless new ethos of NCAA SlamBall will be: All coaches and players can do whatever they want! A little gambling, lying, prostitution, murder cover-up and academic fraud never hurt anyone … sort of. NCAA SlamBall would finally recognize that we can't expect everyone to be perfect.

Plus, man, the TV money would be so sweet.