Science has long attempted to solve life’s great mysteries. Where did we come from? Is there extra-terrestrial life? Why are there no pigeons in Milwaukee? So in the name of discovery, the Trib’s arts and entertainment researchers have at last solved the most important debate of our modern age: Which campus cheese curd is the yummiest? We enlisted the help of our lab-rat colleagues in a blind taste test of the classic Wisconsin cheese nuggets. The results may be the most important discovery in Marquette drunk food science history.

To further investigate each curd’s appeal, we asked our subjects to check three options from a list of cheese curd descriptors that best apply to each golden nugget.  Options ranged from glowing approval (best curd I’ve ever had, good cheese to batter ratio) to the outright disdainful (subpar cheese, too small, too salty).  We chose the top curd for a selection of the most telling descriptors.  Further reactions reveal many were impressed by Cousin’s “free form” look and found Sobelmans’ “tater tot” presentation lacking.  Subjects also noted that all curds in question could use accompaniment from a sauce and/or thorough intoxication.